That’s a great question!
I’ve grew up in a Christian home for most of my life. So as a young child, I knew the bible, I knew about Jesus, and what I needed to do to get to heaven. But I really went through a lot of difficult times. I was bullied a lot throughout my school years, I didn’t feel as though I was a part of my family at home, and I had other traumatic events happen to me at a young age.
These things made me fall into a deep depression. It was the darkest years of my life. I hated everything about myself. Over time, I secluded myself from everyone, dated random guys I met, and didn’t attend school for two years. I believed that if my life was the way it was how could there be a God? I couldn’t believe that God existed in a place like this. Nobody cared about me. I could only help myself.
So with my mother’s help, I sought out therapy and medication. I sought out my then boyfriend. But those things were temporary. I still felt more alone than ever. Then in 2006, I went to an Acquire the Fire event were Pastor Ron Luce asked those who were suffering from depression if they wanted freedom from their depression. I knew that everything else had failed and I wanted to try Jesus’ way for once in my life.
And you know what? I haven’t felt depressed or anxious since. God has proved himself to be more to me than ever. He was there even when I didn’t want him to be because he saved me from my own destruction. I would have been dead right now. So when I read Psalms 139, I smile with confidence. I’m still shy and get nervous doing things on my own. But no matter who makes fun of me and who leaves me, I know God loves me so much and never leave me. I pray that you may feel the same way!
And remember: Christianity is not a religion it is a relationship with Christ!